Every relationship has its preferred way of expression, through which the partners can understand each other best. While love letters and words of affirmation can be a great method to build a comfort space, physical language of love is also just as valid. Physical touch can be a great way of exploration in a relationship, where you and your partner build intimacy through bringing your bodies closer. Connecting physically is not just an indicator of bodily pleasure, but can also help you build trust in taking care of each other’s vulnerable emotional sides.
Be it sex or kissing, when feelings are involved, these acts help you unravel new hidden sides of each other, so you can begin to love them, too. It is in no way less special or pure than poetic gestures of love because physical actions also hold so much within them. There are many ways to do this apart from lip-to-lip kissing, such as different types of kisses with their special meanings, a hot, tingly ear kiss, etc.
One such way of expression through physical touch is the act of leaving hickeys. A hickey is a term for a mark on the skin which is usually reddish-purple, left behind in the throes of passion when one lover gently sucks on the skin of another. While hickeys have given themselves a bad name because of their representation in popular media as a proof of ‘ownership’ or ‘belonging’, an actual hickey in a healthy relationship, is a marker of love. A hickey is a tangible mark on your skin, a special spot that seals the memory of a special moment.
Hickeys should not be given out of toxic feelings, but instead, out of genuine expressions of passion, always having considered consent first. If you have been wanting to give your partner a hickey, it is important to first ask them if they are okay with, preferably before the actual moment, so you don’t break the mood. Guys with hickeys might be sexy, but always remember that consent is even sexier. And well, if you already have the mandatory consent box checked, then you can move on to the next part in the lesson, which is to know everything about hickeys, along with knowing the best places to give hickeys. If you want to show your man the best time, it is not enough to just know how to give hickeys, but also good places for hickeys on a guy.
Before asking where to give a guy a hickey, make sure you brush up on your knowledge of hickeys, especially if you have never tried them before. Guys with hickeys may look roughed up to you with those tantalizing dark spots decorating their skin, but there is an element of gentleness behind a hickey.
It is most important to take care of your partner throughout the process, because only then can they have a comfortable and pleasurable experience. Here is how to leave a hickey correctly:
Don’t just directly jump into the hickey part. Remember the best part is the journey, not the destination. Leave a trail of kisses on your partner’s skin, all the way up to your target spot.
Circle your lips around the spot and suck on the skin, putting enough pressure to affect the capillaries there, but be careful to not cause your partner so much pain. Do it for around 10-30 seconds, taking breaks in the middle to leave kisses on the spot if you want to.
After you’re done, gently press kisses on the spot, waiting for it to turn a shade between red and purple. Kisses on this tender spot can make your partner feel incredibly sensitive, especially if you know the best places to give hickeys.
After a couple of seconds, you should see a light-colored spot appear. If your partner wishes for it to be darker, you can suck on the same spot again, to deepen its color.
Also Read: Kissing on Ears
Now that you know all about how to give a hickey, you may want to up your game by finding out about all the good places for hickeys on a guy. Well, truthfully speaking, there is no one correct answer to the question of where to give a guy a hickey. All bodies are different in their own ways and thus, there may be certain spots which are more erogenous for your partner than for anybody else. Also, there may be some guys with hickeys who are comfortable with them being in visible spots, while others who would rather keep it hidden under the clothing.
Thus, there is no textbook guide that guarantees you the best places to give hickeys, because your partner’s comfort and preferences should always be considered before making a choice. That being said, there are a few popular spots which you can try out leaving hickeys in as long as your partner consents to it. Here are a few popular good places for hickeys on a guy:
Hickeys can only be given properly on places which have a lot of flesh. Thus, the neck becomes a popular choice, given how sensitive it is. When leaving a hickey on a guy’s neck, kiss your way down his jaw, to his neck. Drop a soft kiss right over his pulse before moving to your chosen spot for a hickey and carefully adjusting the pressure according to the color of the hickey you and your partner want. It is important to keep in mind that while this is one of the best places to give hickeys, it is also a very visible place. So, ask your partner if it is okay to give a hickey on their neck because it can prove awkward in any office or work type situations the next day.
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The chest is also a good place for hickeys on a guy because hickeys will appear more quickly on the skin of this region. Give a few licks to the nipples and gently suck around them, before moving to the spot on the chest where you want to give a hickey. Hickeys here will also be easier to hide, for those who do not wish to show them to everyone.
Your partner’s inner thighs are probably extremely sensitive and one of the best places to give hickeys. Hickeys on the inner thighs can feel very tingly, especially when used to heighten the pleasure of a blowjob with a little bit of teasing and edging. When you leave hickeys here, your partner will be pliant and vulnerable under you, giving you the chance of taking care of them while you literally blow their mind.
Ask your partner if they would be fine with trying out hickeys in this spot. Hickeys on abs can elicit a pleasurable response, especially if you gently leave kisses down to the area and then suck right on the tender spot. This could be a spot your partner has not explored before and thus, hickeys on abs can give an unexpected sensitive feeling, that will have your partner tremoring. Along with hickeys on abs, you can also leave hickeys lower, around the navel, to set the mood for foreplay before you move on further south. Hickeys here will also be hidden so it ensures that your partner will not be in any possibly awkward public situations.
Before you ask your partner about trying out giving hickeys, ask yourself your reasons for doing so, to make sure that you will be respecting your partner in the process and see them as a person to express love to, and not as an object to mark. If your partner says no to hickeys in a visible spot, respect their decision and do not push them. Pleasure should never come at the cost of comfort.
While leaving hickeys, also take aftercare into consideration as well, because true intimacy builds in those moments after people are boneless with pleasure. Know the ways to hide hickeys if necessary, in case your partner enjoys having them in visible places. If you are feeling particularly adventurous, you can spice up your hickey session by indulging in some kissing games with different hickey spots as options. Then, get consent, get comfortable, grab some flavored lip balm and get to work!
Also read: How to get rid of Hickey
A. Neck and inner thighs are one of the most pleasurable places to give hickeys.
A. Hickeys generally last from 2 days to 2 weeks.
A. Hickeys are not generally painful. However, some people do find it painful.
A. Warm compresses generally helps in curing Hickeys.
A. No, they are not abusive if it is consensual. However, some people may find it abusive if their partners causes them pain.