Sexuality isn’t based on any norms or criteria, it’s what makes you feel good about yourself. Have you ever been attracted to yourself?
Well, if you ever did, you might be an autosexual. Being autosexual means you feel sexual attraction towards yourself more than others. This does not mean you are selfish or abnormal.
You can have relationships with other people, you are just more aroused by yourself than others. Every person is free to choose their sexual orientation and tendencies. Being autosexual does exist and is completely normal to have.
So, how is it like being an autosexual?
Read on to find out some amazing facts about auto sexuality and how it is like being autosexual!
What is autosexual?
Autosexual is a feeling of sexual attraction towards yourself. It is almost related to the “autoromantic” which refers to having a romantic attraction towards yourself.
An autosexual might prefer to masturbate rather than having sexual intercourse with some other person. Autosexuality has been argued to have a narcissistic nature but most experts disagree as it’s not a valid way of thinking about auto sexuality.
People who identify themselves as autosexuals can have relationships with other people but have a preference for sexual relationships with themselves over others. So, narcissistic behaviour isn’t associated with autosexuals.
If your partner is auto sexual, remember that it is not an insult or attack against you as it doesn’t mean they aren’t sexually attracted towards you or don’t want to have sex with you.
You should have an open mind towards someone who identifies themselves as an autosexual. Understand their sexual orientation with an open mind and heart.
How to know if you are an autosexual?
Autosexual manifests as an assortment of sensual thoughts and feelings that are focused on you by yourself. If you have a sexual relationship with someone, it doesn’t mean that you can’t have sex with them.
You can have a sexual relationship with them while preferring to have sexual feelings for yourself. It can mean sex with oneself (masturbation) while thinking of yourself, touching, watching, imagining yourself while romanticising about oneself.
You might also enjoy mirror sex and are attracted to someone who looks like you or resembles you. You see yourself as an ideal or primary sexual partner.
Why do autosexuals deal with misconceptions?
Jumping to conclusions gives birth to major misconceptions. There’s a huge misconception that an autosexual isn’t a generous lover and is a selfish and narcissistic person.
Yes, an autosexual may indeed get more satisfaction from thinking, touching and fantasising about themselves but it doesn’t mean they do not invest love in their partner’s needs and sexual pleasures.
Autosexuality might be a less common sexual identity and most people aren’t really eager to accept and learn about it which causes a great misunderstanding about autosexuals. This misconception may hurt, shame and insult them when you label someone of something they are not.
Why aren’t autosexuals socially accepted?
Social norms, values and burdens of being an ideal person will always cause a great deal of pressure on people with different sexual orientations. Generally, most people feel shame around masturbation, even though around 98℅ people will do it.
Masturbation isn’t something you should be ashamed about, taking care of yourself in all ways, giving yourself sexual pleasure doesn’t provoke anything harmful or negative. Apart from the shame, the misconceptions and wrong education by parents and teachers affects the way we think about auto sexuality.
We are never taught that being aroused by our own bodies is quite normal and happens to almost everyone. Autosexuality hasn’t got any representation in popular culture which makes it an underrated topic to discuss.
So, more representation and debates about the positive effects of auto sexuality should happen.
What is the difference between autosexual and autoromantic?
The two terms might sound similar but they have a bit of a difference between them. People who are auto romantic have a personal connection with themselves as being romantic.
On the other hand, autosexual people have intense sexual feelings and thoughts about themselves.
Autoromantic people consider giving and receiving love and care only from themselves to themselves and people who are autosexual can have a relationship with others while having a strong and intense relationship with themselves.
Also read: Got Me Planning To Go Solo (Sex!)
What to do if you have a relationship with an autosexual?
You might feel jealous or even insulted but remember that auto sexuality does not limit someone to not make relationships with others. If you have questions, you need to COMMUNICATE.
It is the key to a healthy and happy relationship. It will help you express your feelings, wants, desires and boundaries, this all ultimately makes your relationship stronger.
You may take turns with sexual pleasure rather than trying to achieve it together. You can have sex in front of the mirror.
A little negotiation and compromise go a long way in a relationship. You have a right to sexual pleasure and your partner has the same.
So, it’s important not to take their sexual orientation personally, rather, understand them and be open about sexuality. This will help them stay confident, which can ultimately strengthen your relationship.
Autosexual is a sexual attraction towards oneself, it was a deeply closeted manifestation that wasn’t talked about much earlier. Most people don’t even know if this phenomenon even exists. The shame and pressure of toxic societal values may affect autosexual awareness.
Being an autosexual isn’t narcissistic. It is actually about enjoying your company and loving yourself. With this logic, we can say that we all might be an autosexual.
If you ever realise that you are an autosexual, do not feel shame or consider yourself selfish but come out proud and happy that you enjoy and adore your own body. Having an erotic feeling for yourself or your own body isn’t something you should be guilty about.
Love yourself! 🙂
Read next: Does Masturbation Decrease Stamina?