Women usually prefer to be led on, rather than being on the controlling side these are the ways shy girls can become bold. Some of them are shy and would prefer their partner to make the first move. There are exceptions but this is the general scenario. However, people often misinterpret shyness for disinterest. Studies have shown that most women face insecurities, limitations, and opening up issues before sex, even if they know their partners for years. 

They want to feel loved and pleased but hesitate in saying so, directly. They want their partners to understand things without them making an effort to convey or communicate, effectively. The reason for this can be personal characteristics or sexual stress. In the case of the former, there’s not much you can do except constant efforts but for the latter, you can. In this article, we’d be discussing the things that shy girls need to do to get rid of their shyness during sexual activities. If you want to know more about shy sex, read along!

Also, read: Female Ejaculation

Shy Sex: Key Ways Shy Girls Can Become Bold 

Here are the 7 points by which a shy girl can also become bold during sex:

1. Lingerie 

According to experts, lingerie can go a long way in making you feel confident about yourself and your body. Old and shabby bras and panties won’t just look unappealing but they would bring down your level of self-confidence as well. Shy girls, as we all know, can do well without additional bouts of self-doubt. Added advantage? Your partner’s going to love seeing you in a new avatar. You looking sexier would make your partner feel good and special, but don’t just do it for them. You’re supposed to feel comfortable and sexy in your own body first. You’re your priority. 

2. Self-Love 

To be confident in front of somebody else, you’ve got to be comfortable being yourself. Try foreplaying when you’re alone in your room. You can even set the mood by dimming the lights and putting on scented candles. Masturbating can contribute a great deal to overcome your shyness. 

Shy girls in the bedroom are more so because of their uncertainty about their bodies. If you’re aware of your likes and dislikes, you would be able to interact with your partner and tell them what pleases you. Go ahead and pamper yourself if you feel that would make you think better of yourself. Self-love stems from accepting that however you are, you are beautiful and nobody can make you feel otherwise.  

Related: Self-Pleasure

3. Communication 

The role of effective communication is major in relationships, whether it’s about basic day-to-day issues or sex. Always remember, your partner knows you and is in love with or is extremely attracted to you. You don’t need to pretend to be someone else with them. You can voice your innermost thoughts since sexual pleasure is a two-way thing and both of you deserve to experience it. If you’re shy throughout the process, you won’t be able to feel aroused to the extent you would have, if you were free. Talk about your issues, insecurities, preferences, etc. before actually doing it. 

4. Blindfold Sex 

This is a great way to cancel out the shyness of shy girls. When their partners are blindfolded, shy girls in the bedroom find it easier to make a move. They feel more confident to do things that they wouldn’t have gone ahead and done if they could be seen. In the same way, if shy girls are blindfolded, they might still feel conscious and insecure but their other senses would become more intense, increasing the chances of better sex. The lack of vision is a great way of breaking walls and boundaries, hence acting as a milestone of most relationships. You learn to trust and depend on each other, completely.

5. Wonder About Sex 

Wonder About Sex
Wonder About Sex 

Thinking about sex and fantasizing helps shy girls in overcoming their inhibitions. The more you try to push away those thoughts, the more they’re going to bother you. It’s okay to think about sex and be curious about the various aspects of it. Be inquisitive and ask questions to your partner to initiate a conversation on the topic but don’t go overboard either. You can start reading books on sex or begin to watch porn if you feel these would help. You can even watch them with your partner to break the ice and make things more comfortable. However, don’t get your hopes too high because what you see on screen is not the real story. 

6. Be Expressive 

It feels good to be validated, right? Make it a point to appreciate your partner if they do the right things to please you. In the same way, if you don’t like something, convey it to them. The expression makes the process feel more personal. Even if you cannot interact much, use actions to signify whatever you feel. Reciprocation is very important in sex. 

7. Don’t be Harsh on Yourself 

There’ll be days when you’ll feel more conscious than the others. You have to realize that it’s okay to feel the same. Shy girls often underestimate their limitations to an extent that they’re ready to compromise on their desires. If you’re not ready for it on a certain day, talk to your partner about it. 

shy sex
shy sex

No two days are the same and you’ve got to love yourself, no matter what. If you feel that you need help, talk to professionals and share your problems. You’re sure to find effective solutions. 


We’ve tried to give you a basic overview of what sex is like for shy girls and the basic tips for shy girls in bedrooms that can be employed to spice up their sex lives. If you are one of them and have been finding it difficult to get rid of your shyness, follow the steps and you’ll surely notice differences. Your greatest enemy is comparison. Don’t compare yourself to other women and their experiences. Feelings tend to vary in different people and cannot be compared. Your journey is valid and you deserve to be loved. 

Also, read: Therapy For Sexual Betterment