All long-term relationships have their ups and down parts. Someone rightly said that the road to love is a bumpy one or something like that. It is important for you to know that after spending some time with a person you discover more and more about them; then comes a point when you start feeling a bit bored.
It is obviously not necessary that all relationships have to go through this rough patch, it is just that it is very normal if you are going through one.
If you are wondering if you are going through a similar phase or in other words, a “relationship rut” in order to fix the relationship rut, you have to be able to point out the subtle signs that you are getting into one.
Signs you are in a relationship rut
1. You start having different plans
Remember the time you and your partner would spend hours together or make plans to be around each other more. You would obsessively discuss when you’re meeting next or what you would do together on some days.
Whereas now, you feel like you both don’t exactly look forward to the time, you’d be spending together instead you make separate plans and don’t mind them not being around you all the time.
2. The comparisons
Now also begins the phase for you to compare your relationship to others’. You start looking and believing that the grass is greener on the other side. You would nag your partner for not doing things the others might be doing.
The worst of it all you start comparing your own relationship from the time it started to now. You look at all the ways it has changed and how it is not so much fun anymore.
3. The conversations are getting shorter
Yes, this would be a thing you need to look out for. If you are stuck in a relationship rut, you would probably start communicating less and less. You even prefer texting instead of calling. Since the time you started and were always on your phone with your significant other, you are suddenly out of topics to talk about so you avoid talking altogether.
4. You have other people in your life
The other people in your life are not necessarily a romantic connection, they could also be your friends who you try to confide in more.
You used to share each and every part of your day and every little detail of your life with your partner but now you are doing the same with other people.
Also read: Emotional Affair Is Real And Destructive
5. Physical intimacy is not helping
You remember the time when you could never keep your hands to yourself when you were around your partner whereas now even that is not working out between you two. You have more important things to do instead of it and you complain about it not being the same anymore.
All these signs are some usual you would see in your relationship if you are going through a rut. At this point, you have to decide whether it’s worth saving or not. If you want to know how to reignite the spark or fixing the relationship rut, you should continue to read.
How to get out of a relationship rut?
If you are stressing about a way to fix the relationship rut and get back on the track with your partner, you can try out these fun things
When going through a rough patch in your relationship, you must be honest and communicate your feelings with your partner. You may want to avoid discussing it, in the fear to make things work but you should take the risk. It is best to discuss than to silently pine if you think your partner is not willing to talk first and address it then you do it if you want to save your relationship.
2. Relive past memories
This could be a great way to learn how you really feel about each other. Going through the different phases, couples somehow forget how they felt with their partner when they just started out.
If you go back to the place you had your first date at or talk about the different special moments you spent with each other, you would realize your true feelings for each other.
3. Make plans
To get out of the relationship rut, you have to break the chain of not being around each other anymore. You have to make plans to spend more time with each other. Most often one person in the relationship assumes that the other one doesn’t want to be around anymore so they start doing the same. In a situation like that, communication plays a very important role.
So, if you want to bring yourself and your partner out of the rut, plan out your next trip together or an adventure that you always wanted to take.
4. Ask “The Question”
After being in a relationship for a long time people start wondering about the future. So, a reason behind you going through a rough phase in your relationship is probably because you are afraid to ask the big question, “what next?”
In order to fix the rut, you have to discuss the future, if you both are on the same page if you both want the same things out of the relationship.
5. Find the New
The reason why you have been feeling bored or unhappy with your partner is that you think you have run out of the new and exciting bits. Well, that can’t be completely true. If you want, you can create certain tasks or activities to do together. This way you can come out of the boredom and enjoy life again with your significant other.
The biggest mistake that most people do in their long-term relationships is becoming content with what they have. You have to learn to make your partner feel special at all times. If you feel like you haven’t done that in a long while now, take this as a chance to woo them back again.
Remember, if you want to save your relationship you would be able to at all costs. But never forget that all relationships might not be worth saving. Fixing a relationship rut is easier if both the partners want to or else it will come tumbling down.