Relationships are like fire. If you have ever started or stoked a fire, you know that you can always rebuild or restart it when it is about to die down. In fact, despite what people might tell you, burning bridges is a great way to keep pace in a rat race; dancing in the flames of a burnt bridge is a great motivation to work harder and keep pushing forward.
However, unfortunately, sometimes you might have to go back and rekindle a broken relationship which, in this case, is the burnt bridge for the sake of the better good. Here’s to rebuilding a broken relationship:
How to rebuild a broken relationship?
No matter what the romances of the Elizabethan Age say, relationships are hard and often requires more effort than you think. It’s like an abstract baby that you and the other party share and requires equal passion, involvement, and time from both you and your partner. Sometimes we make hasty decisions that we eventually regret.
However, if your relationship is in such a slump, and you want to rekindle the relationship that the both of you shared with each other, we have a few suggestions that might help you win back your special someone. You never know, this time your relationship might get stronger and better for you know what to expect of each other.
Take the second chance, while you still got the luck.
1. Initiate a warm and friendly dialogue
Take a chance and initiate a conversation. Even a simple ‘Hi’ or a quick raincheck on the person will do it. If you think the person has blocked your contact, you might want to introduce yourself again. Just send a message and check if the other person is still interested. If they are, they will reply.
2. Be clear to yourself and your partner
Be clear with your intentions and utilize this opportunity to be open, honest, and upfront about what you want from the relationship. This will hint to the other party that you respected the relationship that you shared and might help in rebuilding the relationship. Do not expect the other party to read your mind, so, be as clear with your intentions as you can.
3. Be open-minded; love and let yourself be loved
The reason why you intend to fix a relationship is that you respect the relationship you had shared and most importantly because you care about the person involved. Showing your affections to the other person might help him/her to reconsider your previous relationship. But remember, don’t chase someone at the cost of your own mental health and peace of mind.
4. Get over it; it’s time to start a new chapter
Get over the thing that broke you and the other person apart. It is now a thing of the past and should not bother you anymore. Once you have discussed it and resolved the problem, stop dwelling in the past and concentrate on making the most of the present.
5. Be honest (and polite)
Be honest and respectful even when you disagree. Be civil to each other and do not deceive your partner if you want your relationship to work out.
As John Donne once said:
“Whatever dies, was not mixed equally;”
Involve the other person in your life as much as possible. Be interested in their lives, listen to them patiently, and make sure both of you are putting in equal efforts to rebuild the broken relationship.
7. Keep your ego aside and APOLOGIZE
Sometimes a simple ‘sorry’ is too less to resolve a serious conflict. But there is no harm in apologizing; it will allow you to forgive yourself and move on, even if the other party is not convinced.
8. Be responsible for the relationship
Take responsibility for your own actions and be honest with yourself. A relationship is not healthy if it is based on lies to make the other person happy. If any of you disagree on something, sit down and talk about it and try to reach a mutual conclusion.
9. Do not push yourself or your partner too hard
Remember that both you and the other person involved here have animosity towards each other (or at least used to.) If you know the other party well, then you will obviously know what he/she likes or dislikes. Do not trigger the person and try to avoid such circumstances that will get to them. Avoid pushing those buttons no matter how hard you are tempted.
Also, if the other person is not interested in rekindling the relationship, try once, maybe twice, at most thrice, but do not force the other person to do something that they are not willing to.
10. Be positive, think positive and stay positive
Be civil to each other and stay positive. Even if things don’t work out the way you expected it to be, cherish the happy memories you have shared with the other person. If it is a romantic relationship, begin with being friends all over again and relive those positive moments together even if you don’t share a romantic relationship.
11. Be genuine with your efforts and intentions
Be genuine with your intentions and efforts. You do not want to fix relationships because that is toxic or mentally taxing you. Do not pretend to be somebody who you are not just because the other person would prefer such a person. If someone wants to love you, they will love you for who you are.
12. Enforce certain boundaries
Be true to each other and enforce certain boundaries or rules to state what is acceptable in the relationship and what is not. Gently remind the other person when they are overstepping a boundary that both of you mutually established.
13. Fuel the conversation constantly
If you are eager to rekindle a lost relationship, no matter where the conversation is heading, try to bring it back to your goals. If you are happy with the success of the first conversation, schedule a second, and so on.
14. Accept it and move on if the other party is not interested
Despite your humble intentions and best efforts, if you find the other party unresponsive, disinterested, aggressive, or annoyed, forget about rekindling it and move on. No relationship is worth the expense of your self and precious time.
Rebuilding a broken relationship is difficult, but not impossible if both the parties are equally interested and looking forward to it. Try once, try twice, but if the other party has moved on, maybe it is time for you to move on, as well.