How To Talk About SEX With Your Kids?

2 min read

Simran Lakhina
A content writer with a specialization in journalism and mass communication. Being a post-graduate in English, I aspire to write a work of fiction one day. I enjoy interacting with new people and like to be in a positive aura.

‘SEX’ the word in itself creates an aura of hesitation and uncomfortableness. A word that chokes in our throat and creates awkwardness. Talking about sex to your kids can be quite daunting. But before we move to talk about it to our kids, let us try and use this term in the usual way. First, as parents, we need to talk about sex. Be friends with the word, say the word ‘sex’ loud and clear. We have to stop being shy about using this term. If we cannot say sex then how are we going to discuss with anyone, especially our children?

Living in pop culture, talking to your kids about sex can be a ‘big’ thing but it is something kids should necessarily be learning about. In today’s cyberage when every information is just a click away so it is the duty of a parent to make sure that the child never gets misguided because of the internet. Hence, parents should talk to their kids about sex. Instead of making it the ‘major’ topic of discussion, parents should weave sex knowledge into day-to-day conversation. And later induce certain concepts of sex at a later age. 

It is very important for parents to make sure their kids do not feel sex talk as an odd topic to discuss. Firstly, it is important to be friends with your kids to be able to talk about just anything. Sex talk becomes fairly bearable if you create a comfort zone at your place. 

Here are a few sets of advice that a parent should follow when it’s about having the ‘sex talk’:

  • Parents should grab opportunities from everyday conversation to educate and empower their children about intimacy.
  • Real-life relateable incidents can be very helpful in discussing sex with your children. For example, making emphasis on a certain story in the newspaper that is anyway relatable to sex. 
  • The talk should be a two-way street. Don’t just lecture your child about sex but also take their doubts and what they have been knowing and the sources. Openly talk about your child’s thoughts and beliefs. 
  • Movies can be very helpful in talking about love, sex, and relationships. Parents can easily strike a conversation about these topics while watching a movie.
  • Don’t make sex a serious or major topic to talk about. That will make your child conscious and he/she will not open up. Let the talk flow through.

The right age for sex talk

There is a possibility that your child already knows about intimacy due to easy access to pornography in an unrealistic and distorted way. The best way is to initiate the conversation yourself but in a candid way. The best time to talk about sex is just before your child hits puberty that is between the age of 10-12years. But it is no hard and fast rule for you to stick to the numbers. This completely depends on the need of the situation. You will get an indication of your child’s behavior when it will be the right time. 

What to talk about?

First, it is important for you to realize that sex is not a taboo. It is important for parents to realize this very fact before talking to their children about it. For starters, make your child’s mind clear about what puberty is, the changes in the body, feeling, and emotions. Make your child absolutely comfortable about it so he/she feels normal instead of panicking. Make your child comfortable with the terms penis, vagina, vulva, clitoris, bum, nipples, intercourse, and condoms. It is important for your child to know the correct word for his/her genitals. Be a friend and don’t judge your children for having sexual attraction. Be ears and make them comfortable. A healthy discussion on these topics can secure your child from any sexual consequence. A progressive approach towards sex education will help you raise a well knowledgable and confident child. 

Be friends with your child and make a healthy atmosphere at your home. There is nothing more important than guiding your child in the right direction.