What is a mother? When we are defining motherhood, a hoard of adjectives comes to our mind. A mother is selfless, loving, patient, warm, fearless, affectionate, and so on. Well, a mother could be all of these, but that’s not what makes a mother.
Defining motherhood is difficult, and it’s not linear or simple. Many times, we raise questions such as, “What does it mean to be a mother? Or “What defines a good mother?” Unfortunately, there is no single answer to it.
Besides, we don’t think anyone can say who or what makes a good mother. A mother can be whoever she wants to be. All things aside, being a mother is exciting and terrifying at the same time. You want the best for your little one, but at the same time, you have your limitations. If you want to learn how to navigate the rocky road of motherhood, we’re here to help!
There is no dearth of advice or words of caution for the period of motherhood maternity. However, the best way to learn is through experience. On that note, we have compiled some of the best pieces of advice for moms and from moms.
When you disclose your pregnancy, one of the first pieces of advice you will hear from friends and family is that you shouldn’t spoil your baby. But, things don’t really work out that way. You can’t not spoil a baby. As much as you want to resist spoiling your baby, you will give up in the end.
It’s best not to set unrealistic expectations for yourself or think that you won’t spoil your baby. Take things as they come, and as a mother, you will instinctively know between what is pampering and what is spoiling. Also, remember, every child and every situation is different- so take a call that is in the best interest of you and your baby and not to appease an outsider.
This is the most realistic advice that every mom needs to hear. Remember that nothing is constant, and everything is a phase. When your child is giving you a hard time, remember that it won’t last. Babies are like miniature adults, and they are constantly changing.
Therefore, take things as it is, and don’t rush your child through any stage of life. One day you might look back at the past, regretting and wishing you hadn’t.
In the republican motherhood culture, mothers are always made to believe that they have to be constantly busy and do things for their children. What babies need more than anything else is to be left alone at times. They need a mother who is present and self-aware. If you want to wire your baby for the future, do less and cultivate a grounded presence. Always remember that you have nothing to prove to anyone except to your baby.
Motherhood is a difficult journey, and it’s never smooth sailing. If today has been especially hard, that doesn’t mean tomorrow will be hard too. If you were not at your best yesterday, you could make that change today. Every day is a new day, and every new day is a new opportunity.
Always remember to take a nap when you can. Sleep as you haven’t slept in three years. A mother is Superwoman, and Superwoman needs her nap too. Thus, when you find the opportunity, head straight to bed.
Even if you are Superwoman, you can’t do everything by yourself. Allow people to help you. If someone offers to take care of your baby so you can get some time off, accept it. You created and birthed a baby. You deserve all the help in the world you can get. Wave bye-bye to ego and don’t hesitate to accept help.
There are thousands of books on parenting, but does any baby turn out the way you expect them to? No. As a mother, it’s important to trust yourself. Trust your instincts. You created your baby. If you think something is right for your baby, it probably is. We always believe that a mother knows best.
In situations when your family members question your parenting or choices, know that you made the right choice. Besides, you did what you thought was best for the baby. Always trust your capabilities. Know that you were meant to be a mother.
Make use of every photo-op. Nobody ever regrets having too many pictures of their baby. Your baby’s pictures are your most valued possessions. When your baby grows up and gives you a hard time, you can look back at those pictures and feel at peace. Pictures are perhaps the best reminder that no feeling is permanent and everything is a phase. So, don’t be shy. Take out your camera and go click!
Being a mom is one of the hardest titles to hold, and there is nothing called a perfect mother. In the world of motherhood, perfect doesn’t exist. Mothers do whatever they can for their babies, even pushing through limitations. Don’t get discouraged when you fall, and don’t be too hard on yourself.
As we said, there is no lack of advice for moms. Everyone will give you advice, solicited or not. Don’t be afraid to ignore advice and do what you think is best. When you are defining motherhood, it’s valuable to live your own experiences and learn from them. In addition, what is right for one family may not be right for yours. Listen to yourself and let that motherly instinct kick in.
Also Read: Motherhood Stories