Every year, millions of people across the world get married. There are countless reasons why couples like to get married, but the most common reason for it all is love. It is beautiful when you find someone you love and decide to preserve the bond forever. But the first marriage lesson we need to understand is that marriage and wedding are two different things.
While marriages are typically happy affairs and glorified in pop culture, statistics in the United Kingdom and other western countries show that there has been a steady decline in marriage over the years. This means fewer young people are getting married.
Is this a sign that marriages are a bad decision? Maybe and maybe not. The important thing is to know what to expect from a marriage. There are going to be great days and bad days. One needs to be prepared for everything that’s coming. To help you get over cold feet, we have compiled a list of marriage lessons.
Marriage Lessons for A Happy Marriage
Throughout the marriage, the couple is expected to grow and evolve together. When you decide to live with a person, you come across various aspects of their personality that otherwise remain hidden.
Marriage lesson plans help couples to manage expectations and evolve better. They are essential because they determine the success of the relationship.
1. Always marry the one you love
Even though this may seem like a given, you’d be surprised to know that not many people go through with it. Most people marry for the wrong reasons. The most important marriage lesson is to marry the person you love. Happy marriages are the ones where we marry the people we adore. The reason behind marrying someone should always be because you’re in love with them and want to spend the rest of your life with them.
2. Some days will suck
Let’s get real. Every marriage has its fair share of good days and bad days. And, some days will just suck. Most marriages go through periods of difficult years. During this time, you will likely hear a lot of unsolicited opinions. Try to ignore them and focus on the future. No matter what, one thing is always certain. Some days will suck and you can hardly do anything about it. Remember that this is not because of the person but the circumstance that you’re in.
Also Read: 8 Secret Ways To A Successful Marriage
3. Manage your expectations
If you’ve heard older people talk about the mundanity of marriage, don’t be scared. This is perfectly normal. There won’t always be a spark between you and your partner. It’s the familiarity that’s going to keep you together. This is what makes a happy marriage. Learn to manage your expectations and don’t anticipate a lot from your spouse. Expectations rise when you build up pressures and scenarios in your head, therefore, try to stay grounded in the present.
4. Teamwork makes the dream work
The success of a marriage is being on the same side as each other. Learning to be on the same team is one of the most important marriage lessons that every couple should follow. If you view each other as competition, it is a red flag and your marriage will fail sooner than you think.
5. Don’t feel pressured to have kids if you don’t want them
Most married couples think that having kids will solve their marriage problems. But, that’s far from true. Having kids can exacerbate marriage problems. If you don’t want kids, you shouldn’t be made to feel bad about it. Your kids, your decision. Don’t listen to people saying kids will be the greatest gift of your life. If you don’t want that life for yourself, your decision should be respected.
6. Try to keep the spark alive
Being married to a person for several years may become a matter of convenience and familiarity. However, it is on you to keep the spark alive. The secret to a happy marriage is keeping the spark alive. Spend time with each other, have regular date nights, go on an adventure, surprise your significant other. The opportunities here are endless, you just need to seize them!
7. Don’t make comparisons
With social media being intimately intertwined with our lives, it is common to compare your relationship to other people. But, remember that things are never how they seem on the Internet. Your marriage is yours and yours alone. Thus, there is no point in wasting time comparing your marriage to that of other people. Comparing will only make you feel bitter about your marriage and cause unhappiness. So, stop comparing your marriage and start paying attention to the present.
8. Spend some time apart
This may go against everything prescribed by the Catholic marriage lesson plan, but it is crucial to have your own hobbies and spend time apart. If you want your marriage to be healthy, respect each other’s boundaries. Admit that you both have a life beyond each other and it’s okay to invest in that life. Even if you both completely enjoy each other’s company, it’s normal to crave time apart.
9. Be each other’s cheerleader
The secret to a happy marriage is being supportive of each other no matter what. Always support each other’s passions even when they seem ridiculous. If your spouse is investing in an idea you know will fail, don’t be cruel. Support one another’s choices and decisions. In a marriage, realistic aspirations such as individual career advancements, moving to a new city, having kids, etc., won’t be possible if you are not supportive of your partner.
10. Give marriage counseling a try
There is no shame in admitting that things are not going well. Problems are bound to crop up when you’ve been married to someone for years. If things aren’t the best right now, keep an open mind and give marriage counseling a try.
Marriage Lessons Differ
You’ll be surprised to find out what happens when you seek help. Remind yourself that this is a journey that you both want to go on together. A marriage lesson plan isn’t a universal blueprint, just like every person in this world is different, every relationship is also unique.
Also Read: One-Stop Solution To A Happy Marriage